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Over the last few months, I have been reminded of the fears that I had felt back in 2006 when I was afraid that people were not going to like me, and that they would judge me harshly all because of the games I like to play.

They would call me some names, often suggesting that I have a poor attitude towards women, and other things.

So what did I do to deserve this?

I just made a flash game demo, of a jungle girl, fighting against the perils of the jungle using nothing more than her skills to avoid being eaten by snakes and plants and stuff like that.

And some people were criticising me all because of the way I had the jungle girl dressed.
And they said that I had put her in a threatening environment.

I know that it must have been just a couple of individual people saying this, but I was really just wanting to make a game that I would love to play using my limited skills of flash at the time around 8 years ago.

In the end, the forced me to change her outfit, they forced me to make her younger, and they forced me to change the game to make it complicated instead of a simple design.

I see gaming nowdays and look back at my original design, similar to the Game & Watch Octopus game but instead of undersea and octopus's tentacles, you have to avoid the snakes and the plants and gather as many berries as you could.

Gaming today, even some of the casual gaming, is quite simple and yet I was forced to change things in my game all because people who were not into games wanted me to make something all because they expected games to be for kids and to be complicated.

They did not understand that as for my first game, I wanted to start simple and just do something I was comfortable doing for myself to test out what I had in my limited actionscript programming skills.

The game I was forced to make, almost broke me with the number of different issues I had to come across with too much on the screen making it hard to run at a normal frame rate.
So yes, that was my first game and it was ruined by those who less understood me and my capabilities

Over the last few months, I felt that most of the criticism I had felt back then were from people who for some reason, took issues against me, all because they labelled me as misogynist all because I was creative but I was not doing what they expected me to do.

And I was not doing anything wrong, I was just trying to make a game for people in their adult years who had fond memories of how games were back in the 80s on the game and watch but using Flash software.

And I now look back at those days in my TAFE years, and feel like I must have had a real hard luck story.

Not only was I in a class of people who did not really take any interest in gaming, but the flash game was only meant to go as far as being a proposal for a flash game, not an actual full game.

I worked my butt off trying to find the source code just to teach myself programming in action script. and they threw that hard work out the window all because it was not what they wanted me to do.

I had to do my own stuff at home, as well as looking after my younger cousin almost every SECOND NIGHT because of his mother being in a car accident from the year before and his father being distracted on getting his wife home instead of leaving her to be taken care of in the TAC house where she was better looked after.

Sorry, I had to really let myself go on that one, it was a hard time in my life at that stage.

Anyway, I found out that some people in class, were feminists and not the good type that try to fight for equal rights, the feminists I had to encounter in my class were the ones who hated men or hated anything they saw in man culture, or even in geek culture. And they labelled me and my original idea for the game as the problem instead of understanding me.

I felt that something went wrong, and they lashed out against me, and I had no idea why they were so angry with me.

Now with all the ‪#&8206;GamerGate&8236; issues that have been going on in the last few months, I fully understood why some people did not like my original idea of the game I wanted to make in Flash during my TAFE years.

It was not a problem with me, it was the feminist view taken to the extreme.
Also last month, I commented on a video at the anime club we were watching that was looking at trailers at new anime series being advertised in Japan.

One of them looked like it was a visual novel dating sim type of anime.

I said that it might be something I might like to get someday since I like dating sims,
then I heard someone say something that was negative...and I did not know what it was.

I am a little sensitive to some words that start with the letter p, because I know that I love the games that I like, but I just don't like it when people make assumptions about games.

They judged the game as....something...all because the girls in dating sim games are young, and that someone like me who is 30, who plays games like that, they consider it as ....something....

When I play Dating Sim games, I take the role of the character, and the character in the game is dating girls who are similar to his age.

So I don't consider the game as ...something...

But then again, people do have this opinion, and just like the femininism situation, I feel that sometimes we take games too seriously, mostly those who less understand about games than those who do play games

If we think too much about the social implications of a game, and end up criticising the developers and the gamers, just because one person looks at a game in a certain way compared to those who do understand it better. Then we end up falsely accusing the game and its creators and the gamers who are fans of that type of game, for something that has nothing to do with the game itself.

And over the last few months of the whole #GamerGate situation, I can finally look back at those harsh times I faced from others, and know that I am not a bad person, and did not do anything wrong. And that nobody should judge me or my character of who I am, all because of the games that I like to play.

And I am not the only one who has had to go though this experience too.
GamerGate
I know that I have felt the brunt of many criticism in my earlier years of writing stories and did a few flash games in my early years.

Now I have been busy with university, and I had not been able to do much on here since my focus is on my university classes, assignments and exams.

Even trying to prepare to get a job is hard to ballance trying to write stories when my mind is not able to focus on it being distracted from all angles in my life.

But here is something I decided to write about 
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Mature Content Filter is On
(Contains: sexual themes)
Due to events that I have just found out about on the weekend


I am seriously considering to delete the story Chelsea and the Quicksand Octopus that I made for her back in 2011 and 2012, the epic 50 part story that I was forced to put into my Scraps to avoid being butchered back in March last year in 2013.

I don't know why the events that started since last year and eventually lead me to be blocked from commenting on her art came about.

I am only a story writer from the other side of the world in Australia.

So I am aware that I had no real interest in a relationship type of way considering I knew that she was into girls until the events of last year.

So this has really taken me back considering how I don't want to cause conflict with her boyfriend over a story I had written years ago.


So I am leaving this up to all of you people out there on DA who loved the story

You can still view the story on a different site if you wish to ask me via note about it

but on here, I just don't want to risk it with the artist Lady of Mud and her boyfriend who I shall keep secret.

Like I may have said before

I don't understand why sometimes when girls get a boyfriend they seem to want to block all their male friends or their male fans away, even those who are harmless.

But from what I understand from my experience with my school days, I don't think I am the one in the wrong here.

I feel that things have been taken out of context and I feel like I have been made the victim here


So here it goes

should I delete Chelsea and the Quicksand Octopus from my DA scraps gallery?

The epic 50 part story?

Or should I keep it in retrospect that she was a lesbian at the time when I originally wrote the story.
Considering to delete my story
Considering to Delete my Chelsea and the Quicksand Octopus due to recent events that I just found out on the weekend.

She may have blocked me since last year because of things in her life, and she does not want to risk her relationship.


So I am thinking of deleting the story from DA that is in my scraps unless if you all think it should stay,

I will give you all until next week before I make my decision.
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To the girls that I know

If we had been friends on DA in the past

but then you suddenly have a boyfriend

and if I had written any stories or poems for you in the past

before you had a boyfriend

You don't have to worry about me,

I live on the other side of the world in Australia

So I am no real threat to your relationship

But just to make it clear

If you ever want to block me from your DA or Facebook

All you just needed to do was to explain to me about your situation before you block me

Because there are times I have had this happen to me

many times in my school years

A girl I know who I felt they were friends with me

Suddenly ignores me or says things that really hurt me

Only for me to find out that they have a boyfriend

And they don't want me to be friends with them anymore



I never thought that it would also happen online

But I know that it may have happened to many others too

So instead of blocking me and making me question had I done anything wrong

All you need to do is to tell me about the situation

And if you do that, I will be ok with it.


from Tony
Dear girls that I know
I just felt like saying something in case if something like this happened again to me online 
Loading...
I would like to post to apologise to anyone who was made to feel awkward.

Last year, I used to follow an artist on here as a fan of some of her artwork

I knew that she was into girls and not into guys and I was ok with this


I made sure to be careful about what I said, and ask her if she wanted to be in any of my stories that I had written with some of her favourite themes that she is well known for on here on DA

Well since my university got so busy for me in recent years, I had never really been on DA especially last year in 2013 when university for me was so busy


This week, was my first time of really being on DA without having to go offline for life reasons like helping out my family and those in my life that required my attention

so most of the time, when I was online on DA, it was only for short periods of time


Now a day or so ago, I decided to check out her artwork and see if she had submitted any new stuff that I had not seen before, it was around March 2013 when I last commented on her artwork.


To my surprise, even though I was able to view her artwork, I was suddenly not able to comment on her art at all, not even being able to chat with her


So I felt like...this is strange...


I did not know if I had said or did something wrong


Or if something happened that made her think something bad about me.


I felt awful to be honest, I did not know what I had done wrong.


Well, I decided to write her a poem since it was her birthday recently,

then I got the feeling that she might have suddenly been into guys but I was not sure, I was sure she was a girl who was only into girls.


Well, after writing the poem for her birthday, and then contacting one of her friends to politely ask her to read it,


I think I might have made a big mistake....


Seems it turns out, she does have a boyfriend after all,

I did not know about it to be honest, I thought it was just an online friend



So I would like to say that I am sorry if there was anything that I had done wrong.

If I had said anything or did anything if I made them feel awkward.


I did not realize that I was making them feel uncomfortable, it is hard for me to realize what is going on if nobody ever told me or explained to be about the change in situations


So in reply, I would like to say to this artist is that I am so sorry if anything I did or said in the comments to her art last year made her feel awkward

and I am so sorry to her boyfriend who might have felt threatened by me,

I am only a fan of her art and I am only just a story writer who wanted to write stories that she and anyone who was a fan of her art would enjoy it.

I did not really meant to be sounding something that was personal

and like I said earlier, I thought that she was only into girls so I know full well that I am only just a fan to her.


Sorry to everyone


from Tony
An appology
I just felt like saying something before it starts to get too out of hand, I realize that when I tried to make something for someone, and did not realize that allot has changed over the last few years, I felt awful knowing something I tried to do out of kindness was taken out of context


sorry for anyone who felt hurt or awkward for anything that I said or did.
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Mom's against gaming response


I just heard about this tritter page, called moms against gaming
now this is really insulting, almost like discrimination and ignorance against the gaming culture
So in order to respond against people's opinions,
if you, as a person, judge another person in a deeply negative way, such as labelling all people from a certain culture
saying that they are all...murderers, rapists or satanists. all because they play violent videogames or even videogames in general
that is just as worse as the hate and ignorance against those who come from a different race, gender, faith or sexuality
I have learned allot about discrimination while at school and university,
and have been taught to be better than what other people say.
But sadly, we still live in a world full of uneducated people who resort to beliefs based on their own ignorance and suddenly hate and label others in a deeply negative way
even on the news of the politicians claimed that some people are not able to fit within our country.
And he was labeling people from african and middle eastern cultures
Not saying who he was, because he was a new senator,
but you know, with politicians like these spreading hate and ignorance around and using TV as the platform, well no wonder people who don't know about diversity and understanding where discrimination beliefs come from say what they do.
In my town, there was this uproar from a certain part of the community against plans to build a mosque in my home town
but thankfully plans for the mosque went ahead with the local counsel, but still it was disappointing to see the hate and ignorance about a different culture still be present in my community
thankfully there are more people who stood up against the racists and bigotry of a minority few.
I was not able to so anything because I was doing my exams at the time, and only paid attention to it after my exams finished but everything good that was said and done after the bad things were already acted by other members of my local community
As a university student, I have been lucky to work with and talk to other people from different cultures, races, religions, sexuality and even different genders in my day to day life.
I feel that the real problems is that the people who do discriminate against others based on their beliefs, are perhaps people who when growing up never had any positive experiences with other people who are different than them
and maybe their own experiences from people from other cultures are only from what they see and hear on TV, on the news, as you know already, those examples are perhaps the most negative examples that form those negative steriotypes.
I don't hate those who discriminate, to be honest I have a few of those who are good friends of mine or even family members who do have strong beliefs against others that are in a way, racist and discrimination beliefs.
So I can't change them, I know I can't.
All I ask, is for them to look at how others might say bad thing about their own culture, before criticising them.
And I am talking about the those who discriminate against the nerd and geak cultures too like gaming and anime culture that I am part of.

To discriminate and say abusive things or beliefs that say that all gamers are this or all otaku are that, it is just as bad as being racist, sexist, homophobic and all sorts of other discrimination that is used against those who are considered different than the norm
but they are not bad people either, they just need to have more of an open mind and I hope they can have a positive experience that can make them realize that not all gamers are murderers and such like that.
Not to paint all people just because of a minority few from that community did something wrong.
We as a society should be better than this.
Mom's against gaming my response
Just a short facebook post I had posted online.

I felt like saying something that can be heard online

also my university life is ok at the moment

hopefully if things go well, I can finish my university degree in 12 months time

anyway, felt like saying something since I have not posted anything on DA for a long time because of my busy life and university degree
Loading...
Over the last few months, I have been reminded of the fears that I had felt back in 2006 when I was afraid that people were not going to like me, and that they would judge me harshly all because of the games I like to play.

They would call me some names, often suggesting that I have a poor attitude towards women, and other things.

So what did I do to deserve this?

I just made a flash game demo, of a jungle girl, fighting against the perils of the jungle using nothing more than her skills to avoid being eaten by snakes and plants and stuff like that.

And some people were criticising me all because of the way I had the jungle girl dressed.
And they said that I had put her in a threatening environment.

I know that it must have been just a couple of individual people saying this, but I was really just wanting to make a game that I would love to play using my limited skills of flash at the time around 8 years ago.

In the end, the forced me to change her outfit, they forced me to make her younger, and they forced me to change the game to make it complicated instead of a simple design.

I see gaming nowdays and look back at my original design, similar to the Game & Watch Octopus game but instead of undersea and octopus's tentacles, you have to avoid the snakes and the plants and gather as many berries as you could.

Gaming today, even some of the casual gaming, is quite simple and yet I was forced to change things in my game all because people who were not into games wanted me to make something all because they expected games to be for kids and to be complicated.

They did not understand that as for my first game, I wanted to start simple and just do something I was comfortable doing for myself to test out what I had in my limited actionscript programming skills.

The game I was forced to make, almost broke me with the number of different issues I had to come across with too much on the screen making it hard to run at a normal frame rate.
So yes, that was my first game and it was ruined by those who less understood me and my capabilities

Over the last few months, I felt that most of the criticism I had felt back then were from people who for some reason, took issues against me, all because they labelled me as misogynist all because I was creative but I was not doing what they expected me to do.

And I was not doing anything wrong, I was just trying to make a game for people in their adult years who had fond memories of how games were back in the 80s on the game and watch but using Flash software.

And I now look back at those days in my TAFE years, and feel like I must have had a real hard luck story.

Not only was I in a class of people who did not really take any interest in gaming, but the flash game was only meant to go as far as being a proposal for a flash game, not an actual full game.

I worked my butt off trying to find the source code just to teach myself programming in action script. and they threw that hard work out the window all because it was not what they wanted me to do.

I had to do my own stuff at home, as well as looking after my younger cousin almost every SECOND NIGHT because of his mother being in a car accident from the year before and his father being distracted on getting his wife home instead of leaving her to be taken care of in the TAC house where she was better looked after.

Sorry, I had to really let myself go on that one, it was a hard time in my life at that stage.

Anyway, I found out that some people in class, were feminists and not the good type that try to fight for equal rights, the feminists I had to encounter in my class were the ones who hated men or hated anything they saw in man culture, or even in geek culture. And they labelled me and my original idea for the game as the problem instead of understanding me.

I felt that something went wrong, and they lashed out against me, and I had no idea why they were so angry with me.

Now with all the ‪#&8206;GamerGate&8236; issues that have been going on in the last few months, I fully understood why some people did not like my original idea of the game I wanted to make in Flash during my TAFE years.

It was not a problem with me, it was the feminist view taken to the extreme.
Also last month, I commented on a video at the anime club we were watching that was looking at trailers at new anime series being advertised in Japan.

One of them looked like it was a visual novel dating sim type of anime.

I said that it might be something I might like to get someday since I like dating sims,
then I heard someone say something that was negative...and I did not know what it was.

I am a little sensitive to some words that start with the letter p, because I know that I love the games that I like, but I just don't like it when people make assumptions about games.

They judged the game as....something...all because the girls in dating sim games are young, and that someone like me who is 30, who plays games like that, they consider it as ....something....

When I play Dating Sim games, I take the role of the character, and the character in the game is dating girls who are similar to his age.

So I don't consider the game as ...something...

But then again, people do have this opinion, and just like the femininism situation, I feel that sometimes we take games too seriously, mostly those who less understand about games than those who do play games

If we think too much about the social implications of a game, and end up criticising the developers and the gamers, just because one person looks at a game in a certain way compared to those who do understand it better. Then we end up falsely accusing the game and its creators and the gamers who are fans of that type of game, for something that has nothing to do with the game itself.

And over the last few months of the whole #GamerGate situation, I can finally look back at those harsh times I faced from others, and know that I am not a bad person, and did not do anything wrong. And that nobody should judge me or my character of who I am, all because of the games that I like to play.

And I am not the only one who has had to go though this experience too.

deviantID

TBoneTony
Tony
Australia
Name: TBoneTony

Birth Year: 1984

Country: Australia

Interests: Videogames, Anime, Manga, Australian Rules Football and Japanese Music.

Dreams and Ambitions: I want to be able to become a Videogame Developer or a Manga/Anime story writer.

How am I going to get those goals now?: Write Stories and make a simple Flash game to demonstrate my skills.

I am currently at the University of Ballarat doing the Bachelor of IT (Computer Games)
The gaming units are good but the rest of the IT units are boring and have nothing to do with making videogames.
I wish there was also an arts class that would delve into Anime and Manga.

Countries I would like to go to: Canada and Japan.

Ultimate Dream Project: To make a Jungle Girl Manga and turn it into a Jungle Girl Anime and also make a Jungle Girl videogame using Anime style of art.

Childhood Heros:
Gary Ablett Senior (Australian Football Legend)
Shigeru Miyamoto (Videogame Developer legend)
Ken Akamatsu (creator of the Love Hina Manga)
Toshio Maeda (the Tentacle Master for Adults Manga/Anime)
Koji Kondo (Composer to some of Nintendo's greatest music)

Current Residence: Australia
Favourite genre of music: Videogame Music
Favourite style of art: Anime/Manga
Operating System: I use a Apple and Windows laptops
Favourite cartoon character: Misty from the Pokemon Anime
Personal Quote: Life is full of challenges but you can overcome challenges with attitude and spirt
Interests

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:iconburnup19:
burnup19 Featured By Owner Aug 16, 2014
Thanks for the faves.
Reply
:icontbonetony:
TBoneTony Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2014
Feeling awful at the moment

why didn't anybody tell me about something so important?

I felt like I was only just a fan of their work and felt happy to write stories for them back in 2011 and 2012. Been a fan of their work since 2009 or even 2008.

now I feel like situations beyond my own control mean't that I am not welcome on their art anymore. 

:(

If anyone suddenly has a change in their lives and does not want me to write stories for them anymore, please let me know, don't leave me out in the cold.

Just let me know and I will understand the situation. 
Reply
:iconsuccubusqueenx:
SuccubusQueenX Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Thank you for the watch and the fav's \^o^/
Reply
:iconxxroxasandkeyxx:
xxroxasandkeyxx Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2014
Thank you for the watch :)
Reply
:iconpgm-m:
Pgm-M Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
cheers for the fave :3
Reply
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